Böcker av Brian Michael Stegner

Jome and Jolly pulled into the farm just in time to see Hal putting the helicopter away in the storage shed. They pulled up to the shed and Jome jumped out. "Hal, check this out! Look what Jolly won at the County Fair!"Hal lumbered over, wiping his hands on a red rag, "What's this?"Jome opened the truck to reveal seventy pounds of bananas and other fruit. Hal whistled.Jolly opened the side door and stumbled out. His belly was huge, filled with fruit, and all patchy still from where his fur had been eaten. He clutched the door handle with one hand and a big plastic gold trophy in the other. It featured a monkey wearing a tuxedo and a top hat.Jome waved Jolly closer, "Show Hal the trophy!"Jolly drug it over and held it up with indifference. Hal looked genuinely impressed."Wow...County's #1 Monkey? You guys must have really pulled one over their eyes.""I know!" yelled Jome as he slapped his knee. He hadn't been this excited since he had stolen chickens from the neighbors (which he returned later by court-order).The trophy ended up on the mantel above the TV in the living room. Jome looked at it every time his shows broke for commercial. He loved that trophy. It was a symbol of earning something...something by his own hands...or of tricking people...with a monkey that was starving.Whatever it meant, it meant a lot to Jome. Whenever they had visitors or sales people or auditors or government inspectors, he'd always bring them over to the trophy on the mantel, then he'd cross his arms and beam at them without explanation. They would usually mistake the trophy for some sort of sculpture that he was hoping to sell to them, and sometimes they would feel bad and offer him money for it, even if they didn't really want to buy it. This only make Jome feel all the prouder as he vehemently denied their offers of money, which of course was only all the more confusing to them.Jome was understandably upset when one day he glanced over to the mantel and saw that the trophy was not in its place. He leapt from his easy chair, flecks of dried cow's blood flying into the air like sparks from a campfire...-- With Roald Dahl storytelling told at Seth MacFarlane pacing, The Adventures of Jome series will find kindred spirits in fans of The Simpsons, Teen Titians Go, and Adventure Time. Discover "The Next Adventures of Jome", remixed and remastered and now on Amazon! No longer living in the city, Jome works out his rage against cows in the countryside running a "farm." If you missed either of the prior volumes in the series, make sure to read "The First Adventures of Jome" and "The Original Adventures of Jome"

As they got started, Dr. Trillium asked Ralf to tell him a bit about himself. Ralf did so, and went on and on about this "Harry" character, which sounded very much like a mythological creature.Dr Trillium wrote down "hallucinations."Ralf talked about the giant box-house they used to live in with Jome.Dr. Trillium wrote down "illusions of grandeur."Ralf talked about how one day Jome was just gone.Dr. Trillium wrote down "abandonment by Father-figure."Ralf frowned at all of this suspicious note-taking and asked when they would get to the flashcards. Dr. Trillium put down his pen and stared at Ralf, "How do you know about the flashcards?"Ralf went on to explain about Jome, and the cards, and the birds, and the cows, and Harry, and the crying and fighting and how he really, really needed his own set of cards.Dr Trillium nodded and scribbled, and then finally brought out the coveted flashcards. They were glorious, a much bigger, whiter stack than Jome had brought home. Ralf began to wonder to himself if Jome hadn't just made his own cards, as these looked more professional. Nevermind, he was about to own his own flashcards, the real deal. He grinned. But how to get them and escape?Ralf's original plan was to simply snatch the cards from the "psycho" and jump out the window, but Dr. Trillium's office had turned out to be quite a few floors higher than Ralf had anticipated. The moment Dan the social worker hit '47′ in the elevator Ralf frowned and tried to come up with a new exit strategy. He was still working on it when Dr. Trillium started flashing the flashcards in his face, interrupting his thoughts. "What do you see?" asked Dr. Trillium."Parachute," answered Ralf.Another card: "Rope Ladder," said Ralf.More cards: "Helicopter.""Wings.""Teleportation Powers."Dr. Trillium made a "hmm" sound and put the flashcards down. "What are you running from, Ralf?" he asked, putting on what he believed to be a compassionate facial expression.Ralf, thunderstruck by the question, started tearing up involuntarily.Dr. Trillium saw this as a breakthrough. He sat back and smiled.-- With Roald Dahl storytelling told at Seth MacFarlane pacing, The Adventures of Jome series will find kindred spirits in fans of The Simpsons, Teen Titians Go, and Adventure Time. After over a decade of sitting on a shelf somewhere, "The Mysterious Adventures of Jome" is finally publicly available! Ever wonder what happened to Ralf & Harry while Jome was living in the country? This volume is about their adventures, and very much has a "First Adventures of Jome" vibe. If you missed any of the prior volumes in the series, make sure to read The "First Adventures of Jome", The "Original Adventures of Jome", and The "Next Adventures of Jome" so that you have context.

Adolescence is a modern invention, a time where our kids' bodies have grown up but their social lives and responsibilities often haven't. And unfortunately this stage of life seems to be ballooning larger and larger, with young men living at home and playing video games well into their twenties, with little or no interest in vocation, marriage, or anything smacking of responsibility.I am of the opinion that adolescence is totally unnecessary.As parents, we have chosen to erase this stage from our children's lives as much as possible. We have patterned our process after rites of passage used in other cultures and in earlier times where adulthood was thrust upon young men at a time of their father's choosing, usually being given a knife and a slap on the backside as they were sent to live or die on some sort of quest, and womanhood being simply apparent at menstruation.Now before you call child services on us, we did not send our son into the wilderness with a match and a tarp to find his manhood, nor did we tie adulthood to the reproductive maturation of any of our children. Instead we decided to do it more like the Jewish do bar or bat mitzvahs for their thirteen year olds (though we opted to make age twelve the magic number), and to have the process be very similar for each of our kids, regardless of gender. The coming of age "child-to-adult moment" happens on a week-long trip with Papa (Dad). They leave home as a child, and return as an adult.However, in devising this plan, I realized that it was sort of unrealistic of us, and maybe even unfair, to attempt to thrust them into "adulthood" at age twelve, without serious preparation. Therefore we introduced a pre-trip trip at age six, and then a bunch of other elements got added, and pretty soon we had a full-fledged discipleship plan for our kids, ages zero to thirty, pretty much up until they become parents themselves (Lord willing). Doing so requires Extreme Intentionality and Extreme Creativity.This book takes you through our plan, and equips you to create your own.

So you've finished reading Scary Fast, you've memorized all of the principles, but you're still finding yourself laying on the couch? YOU: "Oh actually I never got around to reading Scary Fast..." Hey, it happens. Hard to read a book on advanced productivity if you don't have the will to open the pages. But don't worry, sometimes all you need is a little boost to get you going, and Scary Fast "Launch Assist" is designed to do just that.Nine Weeks of GuidanceDaily Wins, Steps, and HacksThe Perfect Preparation for the "Advanced" Material in Scary Fast (the original book)Follow daily, step by step instructions to get you off the ground!