Böcker av Rob Dircks

I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HUMANS ARE SO CRANKY ABOUT. Their enclosures are large, they ingest over a thousand calories per day, and they're allowed to mate. Plus, they have me. An Autonomous Servile Unit, housed in a mobile/bipedal chassis. I do my job well: keep the humans healthy and happy."Hey you."Heyoo. That's my name, I suppose. It's easier for the humans to remember than 413s98-itr8. I guess I've gotten used to it.---Rob Dircks, bestselling author of Where the Hell is Tesla?, has a "unit" with a problem: how to deliver his package, out in the middle of nowhere, with nothing to guide him. Oh, and with the fate of humanity hanging in the balance. It's a science fiction tale of technology gone haywire, unlikely heroes, and the nature of humanity. (Woah. That last part sounds deep. Don't worry, it's not.)

Like episodes of The Twilight Zone or The Outer Limits, the sixteen stories contained in Listen To The Signal, Short Stories Volume 1 ask questions like, "What would happen if an iPhone game was addictive - to everyone?" and "Are we all living inside a simulation? And if so, who's running it?" and "When a pilot has to emergency land in a remote town near Area 51 what does he find?"Hi, Rob Dircks here. I'm the Audible bestselling author of Where the Hell is Tesla?, and I've been writing and narrating these stories since 2016 on my podcast, Listen To The Signal. But now I've made them available ONLY here in this book. They include: Dakō - Today I Invented Time Travel - End Game - November 8, 2016 - Quick Fix - Horatio Breathed His Last - Purgatory - Out of the Blue - Tick Tick Tick - Rose - Red Parka - Bloop - Their DNA Was No Longer the Same - The Last One - Mister Personality - Christmas in Silver Peak. Back when I started this project, I was thinking what the heck, writing some short stories will keep me fresh, let me try things I might not try otherwise, act as a sort-of sketch book of my story ideas: the funny, the weird, the scary, the sappy, and sometimes all of that mashed up together. Well, two years later, I had no idea how proud I would be of this body of work, and how genuinely psyched I am to be sharing these stories with you in this format. I probably shouldn't pump up the hype too much, and let you decide on your own, but man, going through these again for production, I felt like a proud papa, gathering up all my little babies, or like I was collecting a bag of gems.Wow, I just wrote "bag of gems" in all seriousness, like it's a totally everyday phrase, like I might find myself out on horseback in some medieval European country and have the need to reach into my little leather sack for a gem to purchase an entire village.Anyway, it feels like a bag of gems to me, and I hope it does to you, too.P.S. Your enjoyment of these short stories doesn't end with this book! I'll continue to write more and publish them first free on the Listen To The Signal podcast, I try to do one a month (but you know how that goes). And if you'd like to be reminded when they come out, you can sign up for my very occasional and not-at-all spammy email newsletter at ListenToTheSignal.com or RobDircks.com. P.P.S. The introduction music and some of the individual story music snippets were composed and performed by Danny Greenlees, and used with his permission. You can find his music at zebfrinar.bandcamp.com.

The Third book in the Where the Hell is Tesla? Trilogy is HERE!Listen, having kids is great, my little Gigi Collins and Pete's daughter Hannah are sweet little fluffs of cotton candy, spun from the silk of fairy spiders who live in the clouds. But MAN, can they cause trouble. Seriously, you'd think a two-year-old couldn't possibly threaten the very existence of our physical reality, but, well, you know where this is going. So join me and Pete, and Bobo, and of course the man himself, Nikola Tesla, on another spine-tingling, bowel-loosening thrill ride, and remember: bring your adult diapers. WARNING: If you haven't read Where the Hell is Tesla? and Don't Touch the Blue Stuff! (Where the Hell is Tesla? Book 2), I apologize in advance, as you might get completely freaking lost. If you do, just call my apartment, if I'm not watching Gigi I'll try to pick up the phone, and I'll fill you in. (Assuming our physical reality still exists.) - Chip

I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HUMANS ARE SO CRANKY ABOUT. Their enclosures are large, they ingest over a thousand calories per day, and they're allowed to mate. Plus, they have me. An Autonomous Servile Unit, housed in a mobile/bipedal chassis. I do my job well: keep the humans healthy and happy."Hey you."Heyoo. That's my name, I suppose. It's easier for the humans to remember than 413s98-itr8. I guess I've gotten used to it.---Rob Dircks, bestselling author of Where the Hell is Tesla?, has a "unit" with a problem: how to deliver his package, out in the middle of nowhere, with nothing to guide him. Oh, and with the fate of humanity hanging in the balance. It's a science fiction tale of technology gone haywire, unlikely heroes, and the nature of humanity. (Woah. That last part sounds deep. Don't worry, it's not.)

The sequel to Where the Hell is Tesla? is HERE!SOMETHING CALLED THE "BLUE JUICE" IS COMING. FOR ALL OF US. Luckily, me (Chip Collins), Pete, Nikola Tesla, Bobo, and FBI Agent Gina Phillips are here to kick its ass, and send it back to last Tuesday. Maybe. Or maybe we'll fail, and everyone in the multiverse is doomed. (Seriously, you might want to get that underground bunker ready.) Either way, I've got to get home to Julie and find out… woah, I'm not about to tell you that right here in the book description! TMI.WARNING: If you haven't read Where the Hell is Tesla?, I apologize in advance, as you might get completely freaking lost. If you do, just call my apartment, I'm usually around, and I'll fill you in. (If I'm not stuck in the ITA.) - Chip

It's the self-help book you've always wanted. The one that tells you're fine just the way you are - and that you can probably get away with doing even less.It sounds like a paradox, I know. But just look at the mighty sloth, who makes no excuses for who he is - and becomes everything he needs to be. And now it's your turn. Take a nap instead of mowing the lawn. Save yourself a few steps and jaywalk. Save yourself a few pen strokes and replace your signature with an X. Make life easier, and you'll find that you'll be just as lovable, productive or unproductive as you would've been anyway - but without all the unecessary stress and guilt. Now THAT'S what I call reaching your potential!