Hat Trick

A retired cop plans to run naked down the field during the present-day Army/Navy football game believing this will atone for a fumble made years ago in the same college classic, but with his ego in the way, and two sidekicks running interference by his side, it would be a miracle if they make it past three-dozen security guards. His two side-kicks have goals themselves. One is inflicted with a peeing problem and must get an operation if he wants to piss like a race horse again, and the other, whose wife has died early on in the story, wants to prove his impotency is only temporary.