The New & Improved Republican

We are living in "strange" times America. If our founders and forefathers could come back to life for just one minute they would not recognize the country they gave their lives to build. Yes, we have truly changed. Well, isn't that what all of us wanted? Change?
If you can imagine it create it, fund it and sway the media over to your side, you can conquer a nation. It's true. The good citizens of America will let you conquer their nation. Without firing a shot.
But first, you must achieve two amazing tasks in order to qualify.
1] You must first appear on the liberal talk show, The View and make Barbra Walters and Joy Behar blush and call you "sexy."
2] Then you must "only" address the liberal news media who voted for you and adore you when giving press conferences.
If you can do this, you too could be elected as the leader of the free world! That's not a joke by the way - That just happened in my country on November 4, 2008.
On this day Barack Hussein Obama walked out on stage as the 44th President of The United States of America. A man who had the "Presidential credentials" of a used car salesman.
A man who didn't know the difference between a Brigade or a Battalion. A man who was notorious for his "radical" associations and "shady" background. A man who is a habitual liar.
A man with the most liberal voting record on planet Earth just became my President. It was the slickest political scam in U.S. history. And we just sat back and let it happen.
Isn't it funny how everyone else involved in this historic event was vetted thoroughly but our new President wasn't? That's strange? Or was it intentional?
it's starting again, America. A revolution is coming soon. Very similar to the Civil Rights marches of the 1960's. Except this time it's not from the African-American community or liberal anti-war protesters.
This time it's going to come from young, conservative Republicans. They have power like you wouldn't imagine. That power is going to be "unleashed" very soon. They will become an unstoppable army in the fight for the survival of America. I will be leading them. Who are they? They are The New & Improved Republicans. Who am I? You will know soon enough?
A lady by the name of Sarah Palm recently set fire to an unfocused, exhausted political party- The GOP. I'll let you in on a little secret. This time you won't recognize us. We'll look different We'll have a polished, sharpened message and we'll "play for blood." The stakes? The United States of America. Go ahead, try to take it from us. We're baacckkkk!!